I have DCIS. ductal carcinoma in situ. It was described to me to be something like this. A teenaged boy is drunk out of his mind and has the keys to the car in his hand but he hasn't gotten into the car yet. I have to stop him. I will any way I can. It is really upsetting to get this diagnosis despite people saying congratulations to me and adding, "you have the good kind". What does that mean? Good Kind? The best of the worst, I suppose. I realize there are worse things but sitting here with this shit growing in me is scary, very scary.

I was sent to have a bilateral MRI which I have come to understand as the new standard protocol because, the theory goes, if one has the conditions for cancer in one area of the breast then it is not unlikely to find it some place else. Ask for it and you will get it. They found SOMETHING ELSE. I don't know what it is, if it is anything. Could be a false positive or something worse, something dire, say, stage 4 metastatic cancer that has spread all over and explains the little nagging pains I have in my side a 3:30 am.

NEXT: The girls are a lot of trouble now